They were always such a cheerful bunch!

A classmate from grade school and high school just passed.  He was a friend.  We knew each other well while navigating the difficult seas of the Sisters of Saint Joseph through eighth grade.  We survived and thrived in the awkward teen years at an all male, Catholic high school.  We would bump into each other thereafter during college breaks or while grabbing a pie at Star Tavern (Note for all non-Jersey readers: “pie” is the proper term for pizza.  More on that topic later.). Simply put, Michael was part of the fabric of my youth.

News of someone passing does not fail to remain unique.  Based on all comments among fellow classmates, and I among them, Michael’s passing appeared both unexpected and sudden.  The curious part are the thoughts triggered when confronted with this type of incredibly sad news.

My thoughts have been dwelling on grade school with the news about Michael.  There exist plenty of memories from high school with Michael but something pulls my mind to these younger years.  Sadly, Michael is not the first grade school classmate to pass.  When I learned of the deaths of these other classmates, I did not become mired in grade school memories.  Something differentiated Michael’s passing.

Perhaps Michael taught us a lesson in grade school which we usually do not learn until much later in life.  To appreciate Michael’s lesson for us, the dynamics of my grade school and community need to be better understood.  For me, the story begins a generation earlier.  My grandmother raised my father and his two sisters a few blocks away from Our Lady of the Valley (OLV) grade school in Orange, New Jersey. 

When grown, each of these three siblings in turn raised their own families a little more than one mile away.  The three siblings lived within a four block radius of each other.  Whether intentional or not, every aspect of life remained within walking distance of the OLV church and grade school.  My father and his sisters attended OLV grade school.  In the next generation I attended OLV grade school as did my cousins.

When I attended OLV grade school, all the students walked to school and walked home.  All lived fairly close to the school.  There were no buses.  There were no car pool lanes as no one would be driven to school or picked up.  Typically, both parents worked (to afford Catholic school tuition) so there would be no one to even consider driving students to or from school.  Nannies or child care givers did not exist unless someone’s grandparent lived with them.

Walking to and from school remains part of this story not to complain about walking in cold and rain soaked conditions (which we did) or suggest that we had to walk uphill both going to and coming from school.  Instead, these times became part of the school experience.  At times, after school, some students would venture to nearby Marty’s Delicatessen.  In addition to sandwiches and deli meats, Marty offered soda, candy, gum, and my personal favorite – pretzel rods.  Marty, standing in his apron and appearing as a cross between Ernest Borgnine and Carol O’Connor, would have a small barrel of pretzel rods which cost a few cents each.  Kids would dig through the barrel to avoid the broken pretzel rods and carefully evaluate the salt content of the pretzel to be purchased.  Miraculously, we survived the plethora of dirty hands which crossed over the pretzel rods.

Heading in the opposite direction, students may end up in the Valley Sweet Shop next to the Grand Union supermarket if you could scrape together enough coins for some candy.  The walk home thereafter would take a well worn path.  While I never needed the safety net on these daily journeys to and from school, I can count at least five houses at which I would not hesitate to stop in if I ever needed help.  Two of the houses belonged to my aunts.  Three of the houses belonged to classmates and I knew all their family members.  We did not know it, but some real bonds were made simply walking to or from school.  In contrast, I cannot recall an instance of any of my boys ever walking to grade school or back home.

At the time we went to grade school, the community remained tight knit.  Your family could stop for a pie at DiRocco’s Tavern a mere two blocks from the OLV grade school.  While DiRocco’s served a great pie, the short journey to Star Tavern for a pie would always be worth it.

Side note regarding Star Tavern.  Having been raised 1,000 miles from Jersey, our three boys grew tired of the chorus from Mom and Dad bemoaning that real pizza did not exist in the Memphis area.  On the rare occasion an OK pizza could be discovered, the boys knew the next statement would be: “Of course, it does not come close to Star Tavern pie.”  When our youngest toured potential colleges, our travels took us close to New Jersey.  I diverted our trip to include a stop at Star Tavern.  After his first bite of a Star Tavern pie, my son stared directly at me and declared: “You ruined me for life.”  When I asked for the check, my son told the server that a pie to go had to be added to the order.  The next Star Tavern pie I order will be in honor of Michael as he enjoyed that culinary delicacy as much as the rest of us.

But there was more to food than pie.  For special events such as birthdays, visiting family members, when Mom had it with cooking for everyone else, or simply because it was Thursday, there was Libretti’s.  Libretti’s remains a few blocks from OLV, nestled among houses and the commuter train tracks.  Libretti’s properly bills itself as a “longtime Italian joint for antipasto, pasta & Italian entrees.”  Although since remodeled, during my grade school days, Libretti’s could have served as the backdrop for scenes from The Godfather or Goodfellas.  The cushy, red, imitation leather booths, dim lighting, and dark panelling would make you wonder if plans to whack someone were taking place in the next booth.  It mattered not as the crusty bread and sweet tomato sauce (i.e., gravy) would be worth any risk.  Libretti’s remains in the same location and I know Michael enjoyed it as immensely as we all did.

But why am I recalling these details since Michael passed?  These were shared experiences.  Some events I shared directly with Michael.  Other experiences remained among those activities we engaged in with our families or others.  Yet, all these things were common to us whether walking to and from school, going to Marty’s, grabbing a pie, or dining at Libretti’s.  In thinking about Michael, there existed a distinct common nature to his friendship just as we shared these other common items in our lives.

In our grade school, as in virtually every grade school, circles of friends or cliques formed.  The jocks played all sports; the nerds or brainiacs always made the honor roll; and the self-described cool kids viewed themselves, well, as the cool ones.  In our little microcosm, we layered on ethnic cliques of Irish kids, Italian kids and Black kids.  It really would have messed us up if we had even one Oriental student among us!

Michael simultaneously remained both part of each of these cliques and beyond them.  Michael would be friendly with the jocks especially given his love of baseball.  Yet, he was never defined by that association.  The jocks welcomed and befriended Michael.  Michael could then easily be among the nerds and keenly involved with the brainiac activities among these friends.  Michael could maintain friends across all cliques.  These friendships were genuine and not shallow.

Michael transcended labels and definitions.  They just did not apply to him and how he lived his life.  As a result, he developed true friendships among all; he sought out relationships among all; and all accepted him.  Michael was a friend.  Michael was my friend. And, above all, for our grade school classmates, Michael was OUR friend.  In fact, I am hard pressed to identify one classmate considered a friend of all others beyond Michael.  Sister Veronica might fall beyond the friend classification, but that tale would be a separate blog article.

Oft-times, it is not until well after grade school and later in life that we realize the limiting and silly nature of cliques or our own efforts to limit our friendships.  We may look back and realize that we truly missed out on opportunities for meaningful relationships.  For some of us, we may never learn that lesson and, as such, we miss out on a richer life.  I believe it just came naturally to Michael to be a friend.

These blog articles range from telling the story of the French Elvis to exploring the origins of the modern Santa Claus to revisiting the Great Molasses Flood.  These tales remain fun to write and can even be a good read.  I tie these diverse topics to Estate Planning issues and, admittedly, some of these associations are a stretch.

This article about Michael unfortunately falls into an obvious and easy tie in with Estate Planning.  So very many events are unexpected in our lives, including our ending.  Properly plan ahead with a comprehensive Estate Plan as the catcher in Michael himself would tell you to expect a curve ball any time.

Here’s to OUR friend, Michael! Here’s to the common and shared memories he brought us all! Here’s to the lessons he taught us in being OUR friend!

A career including chart topping albums and No. 1 hits.  A larger than life stage personality which translated to a career on the silver screen.  A life captured in tabloid headlines detailing car crashes, wild parties, and a tempestuous love life.  A funeral attended by current and former heads of state, A-List celebrities, and the Who’s Who of social elites from countries wide and far.  A funeral procession lined by more than 950,000 fans.

By now you know that these descriptions relate to Jean-Phillipe Smet.  Jean-Phillipe Smet?  Who?  Smet?  Never heard of him.  If you fall in the camp of “Who was Smet?”, you are not alone, at least among the Americans.  Perhaps you would know this performer by his stage name:  Johnny Hallyday.  Oh!  Johnny Hallyday!  Of course, that clarifies it.  But who was Johnny Hallyday?

Johnny Hallyday may be the most famous singer, musician, performer and actor you do not know.  Known as the French Elvis, Hallyday picked up his guitar at age 14, swiveled his hips and twisted his lips into a sneer after seeing the 1957 Elvis Presley film “Loving You”.  Hallyday later described the influence of The King: “His voice, the way he moved, everything was sexy.  The first time I saw him, I was paralyzed.”  Hallyday got over his paralysis and gave audiences his own version of sexiness for the next six decades.

Johnny Hallyday may not have been groomed to become the French Elvis, but he clearly started on a path destined for Show Business.  Hallyday’s father performed in the circus.  His mother made a career as a model.  No stage fright in those bloodlines.  However, Hallyday’s parents separated soon after Johnny’s birth with Hallyday’s paternal aunt, Helene, stepping in to raise him.

Helene, a former silent-film actress, spent most of her time as stage manager for her two dancing daughters.  Helene brought Johnny on the never-ending dancing tours of European cities with his performing cousins.  Taking naturally to the stage, Johnny began singing for these audiences during the dancers’ costume changes.

Helene’s American husband, in typical American fashion, called Jean-Phillipe “Johnny” until it stuck.  Johnny, not meaningfully knowing his own parents and adapting to the performing nature of his new family, began using the family stage name of the Hallidays.

By 1955, with Aunt Helene’s encouragement and connections, young Johnny appeared in commercials and landed the role of a schoolboy in a French movie.  After discovering Elvis in 1957, Johnny focused on developing his own rock ’n’ roll style incorporating much of what he learned from Elvis Presley.  After performing in Paris clubs for a few years, Vogue Records signed Johnny with his first album, “Hello Johnny”, released in 1960.  The album cover misspelled Johnny’s last name as “Hallyday”.  Johnny Hallyday was born.

In his own way, the French Elvis skyrocketed to fame much as the original Elvis.  Hallyday’s first single, “Laisse les Files” or “Leave the Girls Alone” remains credited as the first French rock ’n’ roll song.  Hallyday followed up this song with his first multi-million selling song “Vines Dancer le Twist” which is the French version of Chubby Checker’s hit “Let’s Twist Again”.  Just like Elvis, Hallyday served in the military, for France, where he entertained while also served.

Hallyday never broke through to audiences much beyond France and Western Europe.  Nonetheless, fellow musicians appeared to recognize his talents, or succumbed to his charismatic personality.  Early in his career, Hallyday recorded with the Jordannaires, the real Elvis’ back-up group, in Nashville.  Some group called the Jimi Hendrix Experience opened for Hallyday during a 1966 tour (and also partied with Hallyday).  Jimmy Page of Led Zeppelin and Peter Frampton joined Johnny for recording sessions.  Johnny Hallyday hung out with Keith Richards and Bob Dylan.

During his career, Hallyday sold over 110 million records with 5 diamond albums, 40 gold albums, and 22 platinum albums to his credit.  He performed 540 duets with over 200 artists.  The French selected Hallyday as the headline performer for the 1998 Stade de France performance to celebrate France’s victory in the 1998 FIFA World Cup.  In 2000, Johnny held an outdoor concert at the Eiffel Tower with over 500,000 fans attending and 9.5 million television viewers.  One sixth of the population of France paused to take in that performance.

As his music career progressed, Johnny did not slow down.  On his 50th birthday in 1993, after one of his multitude of “come back” albums called “Rock ’n’ Roll Attitude” charted, Johnny issued a 42 CD set, limited edition collection, entitled “Collection: Johnny Hallyday” priced at $1,000 per set, which sold out in two days.  His sales never slowed including his 2002 double CD “A la Vie, a la Mort” or “To Life, to Death” which sold 800,000 copies in its first week.  As recent as 2015, after disclosing his cancer diagnosis, Johnny indirectly once more topped the charts with other artists performing his songs on an album called “We’re All a Little Bit Like Johnny”.

Johnny Hallyday’s acting career failed to include credits such as Beach Blanket Bingo or Viva Las Vegas which would have Johnny performing his music.  Johnny actually appeared as a serious actor with roles such as a career criminal in “The Man on the Train” and a revenge seeking parent in “Vengeance”.  He also dabbled in comedic roles with French comedians and Harvey Kietel.  The critics respected Johnny’s acting chops more so than his music, but even these critics could not deny Johnny’s mass appeal.

Off the stage and away from the movie set, the French closely followed Johnny’s personal life and exploits through the tabloid headlines.  His first four marriages resulted in four divorces, including two of the marriages and divorces to the same woman.  Johnny’s fifth marriage stuck for good, but naturally ended with a will contest between quite young wife number five and children from prior relationships.  His three daughters and one son were the result of relationships with various wives and mistresses.  Johnny very publicly partied hard.  He crashed cars.  And his fans adored him along the journey.  Johnny Halliday served as a dream public figure for the editors of the French tabloids.

Perhaps because Johnny Hallyday appeared so human and so vulnerable he resonated with his legions of fans.  He connected with everyone regardless of status.  French President Jacques Chirac made Johnny a member of the Legion of Honor in 1997.  Yet, Johnny’s favorite past times included riding his Harley on long trips, staying at local hotels, and performing with local artists if requested.  The French Elvis passed away in 2017.

In my Estate Planning practice, my clients do not include mega stars and international artists.  Yet, among my clients I can identify the Johnny Hallydays.  These clients are not well known beyond their immediate families, loved ones, and friends, just as Johnny gained little fame beyond the French borders.  Nonetheless, to this smaller group, those clients are, indeed, the rock stars of their families.  We understand how their presence in the lives of others will be missed so dearly.  

Comprehensive Estate Plans should address all aspects of the clients’ lives and not merely “What happens to my stuff”.  I include a Statement of Intent in trusts through which heartfelt messages can be shared with those left behind.  Even if he cannot perform any more, the Johnny Hallyday in your family can provide comforting words and thoughts while you still hope for one more song. Merci. Merci beaucoup, Johnny Hallyday!

Christmas as a celebration including fancy gift giving, festive parties, parades, and elaborate meals did not really arise until the mid-1800s.  In 1822, a New York City newspaper published the original version of “’Twas the Night Before Christmas”.  This poem provided the basis for the modern image of Santa Claus as the portly, red suit wearing, white bearded, jolly ol’ elf. The rise of entire Christmas Season as an extended shopping and celebratory season then fell in line with publication of Charles Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol” in 1843.  Prior to that time, Christmas remained more subdued in recognition.  

In the 1800s, the Yule Log which could burn for the Twelve Days of Christmas had begun to be phased out as the centerpiece of Holiday traditions.  Society moved toward decorating Christmas trees as a quite visible symbol of Christmas. Edible Christmas treats still remained the prime gift, but other gift giving began to appear in those stockings, hung with care.  Celebrating Christmas as a season unto itself gradually grew in the 1800s.  By the later 1800s, Christmas became a mass-marketing event upon which retailers depended.

The Americas and Europe embraced this new Christmas Season concept.  Large retailers and local shop owners benefitted with the Christmas trade.  With this transition also came some secularizing of Christmas.  Even with roots tracing back to St. Nicholas, the newer version of Santa Claus did not readily tie into the birth of Christ.  Capitalism embraced Santa and tolerated the religious aspects of Christmas.  In fairness, Christian religions still embraced the religious aspects and tolerated the blatant capitalism as folks remained dedicated to religious observances in the Christmas Season.  All was good.

So who would declare a War on Christmas?  There actually have been multiple Wars on Christmas.  Even with a declaration of victory against the War on Christmas in 2016, these Wars on Christmas have been made up affairs intended to serve ulterior purposes of those leading the crusades to putatively save Christmas.  Except one.  The original War on Christmas actually succeeded for almost an entire generation.  This first War on Christmas remains markedly different from all subsequent Wars on Christmas.  Let’s work our way in reverse chronological order to touch upon the modern Wars on Christmas and then explore the first, almost successful, War on Christmas.  We can then determine the true Grinch who almost beat Christmas.

In 2004, then leading conservative talk show host Bill O’Reilly declared there existed a “War on Christmas”.  He actually screamed to his audience that this War threatened the very existence of Christmas.  The basis of O’Reilly’s claim that a war was being waged against Christmas included retailers who did not use the word “Christmas” in advertising; retailers who advised their workers to not say “Merry Christmas”; the leftist media which secularized the Christmas holiday; and Democrats, well, just because they were Democrats and therefore should be blamed.

Each year from 2004 until 2016, between Thanksgiving and Christmas, Bill O’Reilly carried on about the continued War on Christmas.  His ratings soared each year during that time frame.  O’Reilly’s team would search high and low for those who took some action against Christmas, at least in the view of O’Reilly.   O’Reilly then railed against these organizations and companies as they were taking Christ out of Christmas. 

On the retailer side, favorite punching bags for O’Reilly included Target and Starbucks.  Starbucks dared to introduce Holiday cups for its overpriced coffee drinks with those cups not including sufficient Christmas references for O’Reilly.  Boycott Starbucks during the Christmas Season!  Even worse, Target directed its employees that they could not say “Merry Christmas”.  Instead, Target workers could, at best, tell a customer “Happy Holidays”.  Boycott Target during the Christmas Season!  

Notably absent from O’Reilly’s rants were the facts that Target also instructed its workers not to say “Happy Hanukkah”, “Happy Kwanzaa”, and “Happy Diwali” during the Holiday Season.  The facts do not matter when a War on Christmas is being fought!

Bill O’Reilly also directed his ire toward municipalities.  He particularly enjoyed finding towns that refused to put up Nativity displays or would do so only if in conjunction with a Menorah or religious symbols from non-Christian religions.  Such towns might cite potential challenges to use of municipal funds for religious purposes as violative of the Establishment Clause of the First Amendment.  

O’Reilly then would bring out his well-worn trope that our Founding Fathers recognized Christmas with Nativity displays and celebrated Christmas as O’Reilly and his followers want the celebration to continue.  Ahh.  There it is.  Celebrating Christmas is fine.  Recognizing aspects of a non-Christian Holiday, celebrated by those who do not look like Bill O’Reilly or follow his beliefs, is not fine.

It took the election of Donald Trump in 2016 for Bill O’Reilly to declare an end to the War on Christmas.  Why?  During the campaign, Trump declared that we will all again say “Merry Christmas” at Christmas time.  Once Trump was elected, O’Reilly declared:  “How about all those department stores they have the bells and they have the red walls and they have the snow but they don’t have Merry Christmas?  I think they’re going to start putting up Merry Christmas.”  An official end to the War!

Yet, since 2016, some businesses still direct employees to not say “Merry Christmas”.  In fact, the American Family Association publishes its annual list of Christmas friendly and not-so friendly businesses with direction that only the Christmas friendly stores should get your business.  Bill O’Reilly established his true purpose in battling the supposed War on Christmas by abandoning the fight entirely in 2016 once Trump was elected.  O’Reilly moved the political needle with his efforts and left the cause behind once political objectives were achieved.  

Bill O’Reilly is not the first modern champion to take on the War on Christmas.  In the 1950s, the John Birch Society declared that America needed to fight a War on Christmas being waged by Communists and the United Nations.  In fact, this War included a conspiracy among Communists, both here in the United States and abroad, together with the United Nations to secularize Christmas.  The goal of this conspiracy was to undermine American democracy and capitalism while socializing America.  America was not terribly long removed from World War II with the Axis of Evil still fresh in the minds of many.  The John Birch Society easily tapped into these lingering feelings in setting up a straw opponent challenging a beloved Holiday and its traditions.  Through a campaign of fear, the John Birch Society sought to turn this War on Christmas into political gains.

The John Birch Society learned much from Henry Ford.  In addition to his auto-making achievements, Henry Ford quite publicly crusaded in the area of anti-Semitism.  In 1919, Ford bought a struggling newspaper which he transformed into an outlet for his deeply held anti-Semitic views.  The newspaper included one page entitled “Mr. Ford’s Views” through which Henry Ford blamed the Jews for World War I, short skirts on women, and the rise of jazz music.  In 1920, on the front page, this newspaper began including a weekly article entitled “The International Jew: The World’s Problem” wherein Ford would present some circumstances or conspiracy theory to “prove” that Jews were seeking world domination.  Henry Ford required that his auto dealerships carry this newspaper and display it for customers.

In the 1920s, Henry Ford’s anti-Semitism collided with Jewish organizations who opposed Bible readings during Christmas pageants in public schools.  The Jewish groups challenged this practice under the Establishment Clause of the First Amendment.  Henry Ford took such objections personally and quite publicly supported the efforts against these organizations.  For Henry Ford, these Jewish groups challenged Christmas itself, without deeming it a “War on Christmas”.  For Ford, the Jewish people were the immigrant class seeking to displace Christian, white-controlled institutions.

For Bill O’Reilly, the John Birch Society, or Henry Ford, the playbook remained the same.  White Christian nationalists needed to find an enemy in order to hold onto the America they desired.  The enemies in these Wars on Christmas were Jews, Communists, liberals, or anyone not on the right.  These battles were much more political than religious.

Then there were the Puritans.  

The Puritans growled, with their Grinch fingers nervously drumming.  We must find some way to keep Christmas from coming.

In the first War on Christmas in the Americas, the Puritans actually won for more than two decades.  The Massachusetts Bay Colony outlawed Christmas celebrations in 1659.  This law lasted on the books until 1681.  However, the Puritanical War on Christmas appeared quite different than the modern counterparts.  For starters, the Puritans wanted to end Christmas and stop others from celebrating the birth of Christ.  

For the Puritans in the 17th century, both in England and in the American colonies, a primary goal remained ridding the church of any of the growing Catholic influence.  For these Puritans, life was black and white: if it was not referenced in the Bible, it should not be observed.  Christmas is not mentioned in scripture.  Therefore, Christmas celebrations must be gone.  

Even worse, Christmas as a celebration, appeared to have roots in the Roman pagan ritual of Saturnalia.  Saturnalia, falling at the Winter solstice, celebrated the days getting longer.  Festivities included candle-lighting, caroling and wassailing.  The Catholic Church, as it has done with many pagan rituals, coopted the Saturnalia vestiges into what became Christmas celebrations.  

For the Puritans, Christmas suffered on multiple fronts.  Foremost, it was not in the Bible so it should never be a religious event.  Second, the celebrations arose from pagan rituals.  Third, it appeared as a creation of the Pope and Vatican influences.  Christmas represented the trifecta of bad acts for the Puritans.  To allow Christmas recognition and celebration would amount to Papist idolatry.  

Then the Puritans got an awful idea!  An awful idea!  The Puritans got a wonderful, awful idea!

In 1647, the English Parliament made up of mostly Puritan representatives, outlawed Christmas services and all celebrations which went with them.  In 1654, the Calvinist church in Scotland followed suit and banned Christmas.  The Calvinists were Puritans in everything except name.  The leaders in the colonies took note and outlawed Christmas in the Massachusetts Bay Colony in 1659.  In the 1660s, the governments and churches in England backed off these laws.  Yet, they remind effective in the Massachusetts Bay Colony until 1681.  

While no longer against the law after 1681, in the Americas, celebrating Christmas was left to the Catholics, Episcopalians and Methodists well into the 1800s.  In fact, it took until 1870 for Christmas to be declared a federal holiday in the United States.  Even then, a number of “Bible-based” Christian religions, most notably Baptists and Presbyterians, continued to shun Christmas recognition and celebrations.  

In one sense, the Puritanical War on Christmas appears as the opposite of the modern Wars on Christmas.  The Puritans tried to stamp out Christmas entirely while the modern efforts wanted more Christ in Christmas.  Nonetheless, all these Wars on Christmas shared a disturbing foundation: fear and hatred of others.  Henry Ford openly hated the Jews.  The John Birch Society feared the Communists and socialism.  Bill O’Reilly perhaps loved ratings more than hating others, but his hurtful undercurrents and disdain still come through in his own War on Christmas.  The Puritans both feared and hated the Pope and Catholic influence in the new world order.  All of this hatred in the name of Christmas does not strike me as very Christmasy.  We should be leery of any further Wars on Christmas.

But this sound wasn’t sad!  Why, this sound sounded glad!

The 17th century, fun-loving Puritans succeeded where modern Christmas warriors failed.  While difficult to imagine, there could be no legal Christmas celebrations for over twenty years during a period in our history.  If the Puritans succeeded, I would not be listening to Christmas music as I pen this article as I am so doing.  I would not be looking forward to my wife’s Christmas cookies as I am so doing.  And we would not be planning to get together with our three boys over Christmas as we are so doing.  As I walk the dog this evening, I will especially admire the Christmas lights placed on my neighbors’ houses and be warmed by the thought that the original Grinch did not succeed in preventing Christmas from coming.  

Happy Hanukah, Happy Kwanzaa, Happy Diwali, and Merry Christmas to you.  Happy Festivus to the Rest of Us.

A good number of years ago in Ireland, a fellow known as Stingy Jack maintained less than a stellar reputation.  Stingy Jack derived tremendous pleasure in playing tricks on all.  He fooled villagers and travelers alike.  He tricked his family members.  On occasion, he even pranked his own mother.  Few enjoyed the company of Stingy Jack who appeared deficient on goodwill toward his fellow man rather than stingy with his purse.

Adding to this charming persona, Stingy Jack was a drunkard who spent most of his free time at the local pub.  While at the pub with the Devil himself, Stingy Jack took the Devil up on an offer for drinks.  Stingy Jack only had to agree to give his soul to the Devil for the drinks.  Stingy Jack asked how the Devil would pay for the drinks.  The Devil changed himself into a coin to pay for the drinks.  Stingy Jack, always the trickster, placed the coin in his pocket next to a cross.  Being stuck beside a cross, the Devil lost his powers and remained a coin in Stingy Jack’s slacks.

The Devil pleaded for his freedom and offered not to take Stingy Jack’s soul at least not until Stingy Jack died.  Stingy Jack freed the Devil, only to encounter the Devil years later in an apple orchard.  The Devil sought payment of Stingy Jack’s soul.  Stingy Jack said he was ready, but requested an apple from a nearby tree as his last wish.  The Devil climbed the apple tree to retrieve an apple.  Stingy Jack quickly carved a cross into the tree thereby once again trapping the Devil high up in the apple tree.  

Apparently with a little self-reflection on his life until that moment, Stingy Jack demanded that his soul would never pass into Hell after Stingy Jack died.  It appears that Stingy Jack recognized his immortal need for insurance.  The Devil agreed in order to secure his freedom.  

Years later, Stingy Jack died and traveled to the Pearly Gates of Heaven.  Saint Peter greeted Stingy Jack advising that there would be no admittance to Heaven as Stingy Jack spent his life miserably and in a cruel fashion.  Stingy Jack wasted his life and his worthless nature did not merit entrance to Heaven.  Not knowing where to turn, Stingy Jack showed up at the gates of Hell.  The Devil, true to his word, denied Stingy Jack entrance to Hell, although the Devil certainly believed that Stingy Jack belonged there.

Stingy Jack shrewdly avoided eternal damnation in Hell.  Yet, he ignored the other half of the equation and continued with his less than heavenly approach to life while on Earth.  

Stingy Jack asked what would happen to him with the Devil replying that Stingy Jack must eternally wander the Netherworld between Heaven and Hell.  Stingy Jack complained that the Netherworld presented total darkness and Stingy Jack could not see his way.  The Devil tossed Stingy Jack an ember from the fires of Hell to light Stingy Jack’s way.  Stingy Jack carved out a rutabaga and placed the eternal ember in the hollow root vegetable to light his path.  From that day forward, Stingy Jack would forever roam the Earth without a resting place with his dimly lit rutabaga as his only light.

The Irish thereafter called Stingy Jack “Jack of the Lantern” which, when shortened, became “Jack O’Lantern”.

On All Hallow’s Eve, the Irish would carve out rutabagas, turnips or gourds and place a lit candle inside the vegetable to ward off Stingy Jack and other evil spirits.  This tradition continued for centuries with a slight change in the mid-1800s.  The new Irish immigrants to the United States quickly recognize that pumpkins much better fit the bill for carving at Halloween than rutabagas and turnips.  The Irish back in the homeland did not use pumpkins as no pumpkins were grown in Ireland.  The modern Jack O’Lantern became a staple of the Halloween celebration.

But how did Stingy Jack become associated with Halloween itself?  His story stands apart from All Hallow’s Eve.  The lessons we may learn from his life do not readily tie into Halloween.  The “scary” side of Halloween’s history may shed more light on the Stingy Jack’s eternal wandering, at least more light than a dimly lit rutabaga.

The Celtic pagan ritual of Samhain celebrated each October 31, recognizes the end of summer and beginning of the darker months ahead.  At this time between seasons, the spirit world among us becomes visible.  Spirits could freely travel with us and cause supernatural mischief.  The spirits needed to be appeased and avoided.  The tradition of leaving food, wine and treats for the deceased spirits arose as a bribe for the spirits to leave us alone.  Soul cakes, the precursor to candy treats, would be prepared and left out.  But more would be needed to ensure our own well-being.

Disguises in the form of masks and frightening costumes would fool the spirits.  The spirits would avoid anyone so dressed up as they would falsely believe them to be just another spirit.  The scarier the costume, the better the odds of surviving All Hallow’s Eve.  

In these traditions, an old guy eternally walking the Earth carrying a rutabaga with an ember from Hell as his lantern found a home.  Stingy Jack may not be welcome in Heaven and may be precluded from Hell, but he fit right in with the Samhain crowd, at least one night a year.

In honoring Stingy Jack and perhaps even more as an effort to keep him at distance, we carve pumpkins into Jack O’Lanterns.  Those perfectly stenciled pumpkin carvings with intricate patterns and detail may nicely shine on walkways.  Yet, it strikes me that such Jack O’Lanterns may be ineffective in dealing with Stingy Jack.  Going forward, I am in the camp of those poorly carved, can you tell if it is even a face, Jack O’Lanterns.  A Jack O’Lantern should be the result of a child envisioning a perfectly scary face then butchering a pumpkin to the point that the eyes are uneven, an off-center hole is the nose, and the mouth has but one large tooth.  That type of Jack O’Lantern would be Stingy Jack worthy!

In Estate Planning, when considering disinheritance of someone, we may encounter the Stingy Jack client.  That client starts off with a firm position that one child must be disinherited.  I never ask for details regarding such relationships and instead focus on the methods of disinheritance and risks presented to estate plan documents if not done properly.  Nonetheless, these clients feel it imperative to explain the reasons for disinheritance.  My office  becomes a confessional.  

As the planning process unfolds and that Stingy Jack client ponders these actions more deeply and prepares to set forth that disinheritance position in stone (or at least on paper in a trust), a little self-reflection may soften the rough edges.  A number of these clients come back to a less than full disinheritance position.  Nothing has changed between the client and the estranged family member.  No reconciliation has taken place.  Yet, something fundamental changed.  Perhaps these clients have their own Stingy Jack moment where they think they need some insurance against a drastic decision.  I would like to believe that the change is made out of affection for the wayward family member rather than securing a Stay Out of Hell card.

This Halloween, in addition to rooting for the poorly carved, scary looking pumpkins, I also will cheer for the more authentic costumes.  Our doorstep has been visited by way too many Spidermen and princesses the past few years.  Those kids are cute, for sure, but those lame costumes will not frighten away the mischievous spirits.  I say, any kid who shows up with a scary mask and frightening costume gets an extra piece of candy.  If a daring child knocks on our door dressed as an old man toting a carved out dimly lit rutabaga, that kid should get all the candy.  Enjoy your own Trick or Treating. 

I admit that I am not a big social media participant.  I worry not about the number of my “friends”.  I “follow” others only if I personally know them.  I do not tweet (or X-tweet now).  I do not check my social media accounts hourly, daily, or many times even weekly.

Despite this lack of attention, a recent post from an actual friend caught my eye.  The entire post consisted of: “I am looking for a Roy Orbison article.”  That’s it.  Nothing more.  No context.  No reference to an article about Roy Orbison’s life, music, career, or otherwise.  Responses to this post by others included comments about Roy Orbison’s unique voice, hit songs, and his musical abilities, but no one inquired about the nature of the article sought by my friend.

Without more, I will rise to the challenge.  Here is a Blog article about Roy Orbison for my friend Dave.  With minimum digging, Roy Orbison’s life offers a tapestry of riches for any writer.  Roy’s gift of a guitar from his father at age 6 and confirmation that he would pursue a life in music by age 7 could be a good article.  Roy’s early Texas influences including Country music star Lefty Fazzell, who later served as the namesake for Roy’s character as Lefty Wilbury, could be grist for a good story.  Orbison’s personal tragedies of loss of his wife and two of his children in horrible accidents remains prime canon fodder for any tail.  Hanging out with Elvis, Carl Perkins, Jerry Lee Lewis and Johnny Cash for three years at Sun Studios, including Elvis loaning Roy his purple Cadillac to impress Roy’s date, represents writer’s gold.

Instead, our story about Roy Orbison begins in the pubs and wedding halls in northwest England in the late 1950s.  Sixteen year old guitarist John Lennon plays with the Quarrymen when fifteen year old Paul McCartney joins the band for a few numbers during each gig.  Paul’s guitar playing improves to the point where he gets a solo on “Guitar Boogie”.  However, the fifteen year old proved too nervous to perform well on stage on his solo forcing the band to reach out for fellow fifteen yer old guitarist George Harrison to join them.  The core of the Beatles became cast by late 1957.

The Quarrymen played local parties, wedding receptions and at pubs in Liverpool and Manchester during 1958 and 1959.  Trying to gain traction, they also performed as Johnny and the Moon Dogs, the Silver Beetles, and the Silver Beats at this time.  John Lennon and bassist Stuart Sutcliffe coined the term “Beatles” by combining the Silver Beetles and Silver Beats.

During this period, the band, under whatever name they used, could not keep a drummer.  Paul McCartney even played drums for a few shows considering himself pretty good at it.  Apparently, the rest of the band disagreed with a search continuing for a drummer.  In August 1960, the band’s manager and booking agent, Allen Williams, convinced the band to travel to Hamburg, Germany to play for a while as Williams previously had success with sending other bands abroad.  One problem:  the band still lacked a drummer.  Williams recruited drummer Pete Best from a different band and sent him along to Hamburg as the Beatles’ new drummer.

Between 1960 and 1962, the Beatles split their time between Liverpool and Hamburg.  John Lennon credits the young German audiences with pushing the band’s development.  The Germans demanded that these bands play lengthy sets and play loud.  That dynamic forced Lennon-McCartney to create more music to feed the demand.  As Lennon put it: “We really had to hammer.”

Of course, the Beatles big break came in January 1962 when record store owner Brian Epstein “discovered” the Beatles in Liverpool signing them to a five year management contract.  1962 became the year of change for the Beatles.  In April, bass player Stuart Sutcliffe died suddenly of a brain hemorrhage.  In June, the band got a shot at recording, being teamed up with producer George Martin.  The Beatles recorded various singles including “Love Me Do” and “PS I Love You”.  In August, Martin let Epstein know that drummer Pete Best was holding back the band.  Epstein immediately fired Pete Best thereby relegating him to an answer to trivia questions for generations to come.  Epstein turned to the son of a local confectioner, Ringo Starr as the new drummer.  August 1962 – the Beatles as we know them.

January 1963, the Beatles release “Please Please Me” which shot up to No. 1 on the U.K. charts.  The Beatles followed a string of Top Ten hits in the U.K. during 1963 and became a touring sensation in Great Britain.

While the Beatles evolved and started to find their groove, back in the States, in 1960, Roy Orbison — you remember Roy Orbison — this article is about Roy Orbison — wrote and pitched “Only the Lonely” to Elvis Presley and the Everly Brothers.  After they each rejected the song, Orbison recorded it himself.  “Only the Lonely” charted out as No. 2 in the U.S. and No. 1 in the U.K. and Australia.  Between 1960 and 1963, Roy Orbison pumped out a series of hits including “Running Scared”, “Crying”, and “Dream Baby” which each raced up the charts in the U.S. and the U.K.  “Pretty Woman” was added to the mix.  By 1963, Roy Orbison was established both in the States and across the pond.

With their own freshly minted No. 1 songs now in hand in 1963, the Beatles planned a U.K. tour with Duane Eddy billed as the top performer.  Eddy was pulled from the tour with Roy Orbison asked to take on the top billing spot to tour with this new group, the Beatles.  Orbison arrived in England having never heard of the Beatles or their songs.  Roy and the Beatles met for the first time backstage before their first scheduled performance.

Orbison asked “What’s a Beatle, anyway?”  John Lennon tapped him on the shoulder and responded “I am”.  This interaction began the unlikely friendship between Roy Orbison and the Beatles.

The Beatles and Orbison discussed the order of performance for the show with Orbison stating that he would gladly play first and give “top billing” to the up and coming Beatles.  The Beatles watched in awe as Orbison, dressed in his trademark performance black clothes, strode to the center of the stage with his guitar and simply played and sang.  He did not move from the center stage position.  He did not dance around.  He just performed.  This approach was the antithesis from what the Beatles learned in Hamburg which demanded high energy and high volume songs.  After the tour, the Beatles remained amazed that Roy Orbison so captivated the crowd while simply standing still in one spot on the stage.

The audience roared with applause for Roy Orbison.  Orbison played encore after encore with the crowd chanting “We want Roy” every time he exited the stage.  After the fourteenth encore, John Lennon and George Harrison grabbed Orbison by the shoulders and told him that they would not let him go back out for a fifteenth encore as the Beatles had to get on the stage.  

During this tour, before one show, Orbison lost his black framed glasses.  He grabbed his dark prescription sunglasses, also set in large black frames, for his set and realized he liked using the sunglasses better with the spotlights.  Thereafter, Roy always performed with his dark sunglasses regardless of venue.

Bruce Springsteen inducted Roy Orbison into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1987.  In tribute, Springsteen concluded his speech as follows:  “I wanted a record with words like Bob Dylan that sounded like Phil Spector – but, most of all, I wanted to sing like Roy Orbison.  Now, everyone knows that no one sings like Roy Orbison.”  We all knew the incredible range of Roy Orbison’s voice.  Now we can better appreciate how Roy Orbison and George Harrison so easily teamed up in the Traveling Wilburys in the late 1980s.

I have learned with Estate Planning clients that everyone has their own story with unique and unexpected interactions during the journey of their lives.  Perhaps we do not have chart topping musical hits or perhaps we do not meet the Beatles.  Yet, these interactions and relationships remain important to us.  Some clients wish to utilize their estate plans to recognize special events or relationships in their lives.  Clients may memorialize such events with a modest distribution or donation to a deserving cause in the name of a special person.  The Will or Living Trust could simply include a statement of the importance of the underlying event.  For these clients, when we prepare to sign the myriad of documents in their Estate Plan, without failure inquire if these token or special gestures are properly included in their documents.  Events along the journey for each of us matter as does an article about Roy Orbison for my friend Dave.

Happy July 4th Week!  Many are on vacation this week or at least taking it easier with a mid-week 4th of July.  The Blog decided to kick back a little as well with reflections on the Silver Screen – Estate Planning Edition.  OK.  Very few, if any, movies follow that ever-exciting plot device of estate planning: “Ooh, will they choose a Will or Revocable Living Trust — or maybe even a Domestic Asset Protection Trust.  Oh, boy!”  Instead, the dynamic conflict and drama flows more naturally after someone dies with all left to fight for the spoils of the deceased.

With focus on the post-death battles for the riches, then, what can Hollywood teach us about estate planning and ourselves?

Secrets, Secrets, Secrets

Charlie Babbit spent life as an only child, rather spoiled, and growing more distant from his parents each year until they passed.  Expecting an oversized inheritance to match his oversized ego, Charlie instead learned through his parents’ trust that he had a brother; the brother had autism; the parents institutionalized his brother; AND everything except a vintage car was left in trust exclusively for the benefit of his brother — Raymond Babbit or Rain Man.

Charlie’s frustrations in not securing the expected death windfall from the estate is taken out in the form of anger directed against the trustee who refuses Charlie’s demands for money.  The trustee simply fulfills his duties to protect Rain Man.  Charlie’s ire should be focused on his parents who refused and failed to even mention the special needs sibling. The parents took their secret to their graves.

Of course, after kidnapping Rain Man and a cross-country adventure worthy of Thelma and Louise, Charlie slowly discovers brotherly love and a desire to provide and care for his long lost brother.  Charlie decides not to use Rain Man as bait for ransom payments.

The saddest part of Rain Man remains the parents’ secret which denied Charlie and Rain Man the opportunity of a lifelong relationship.  Perhaps Charlie would have steadfastly continued in his self-centered existence even if he knew of Rain Man.  We do not know.

Quite often, clients question whether they should disclose details of their estate plan to their children.  I counsel that, at a minimum, the children should be made aware that an estate plan exists with the plan containing directions and wishes of the parents.  I further encourage some level of discussion among family members especially if ultimate distributions and perceived expectations of the children may not align.  If an unknown sibling exists whose identity will become known only after death and that sibling stands to inherit everything, I can only suggest a different type of family counseling requiring advanced degrees beyond my law degree.

Words Are Important

I try my best to avoid crafting any part of a Will or Trust leaving anything to the “closest relative”.  My practice became validated in A Series of Unfortunate Events.  These novelettes, combined to form the basis for the movie, follow the misfortunes of the orphaned Baudelaire children; Violet, Klaus and Sunny.  The dastardly Count Olaf continues to plot the orphans’ demise in an on-going effort to gain their fortune.  The insane plots and crazy characters are not of interest here although they abound in the movie.  Instead, the origins triggering this series of misfortunes matter.

The Baudelaire tragedy begins with a day at the beach for the three children interrupted by the family banker and trustee, Mr. Poe.  Mr. Poe delivers the horrible news that the Baudelaire parents just perished in a fire which consumed the family mansion.  Rather than grieving the loss or addressing the myriad of emotions the children must be confronting, Mr. Poe swoops up the children to deliver them to their new legal guardian, care taker, and very distant relative, Count Olaf.  

However, Violet, Klaus and Sunny had never even heard the name of Count Olaf mentioned in their family and do not know him.  The children protest that their parents surely would have selected others as guardians such as closer relatives well-known to the children.  Aunts and uncles who were part of the fabric of the lives of the children could serve as guardians for the newly minted orphans.

Yet, Mr. Poe will not hear of such protests as the parents’ trust clearly states that the “closest” relative of the Baudelaire parents becomes guardian if one is ever needed.  Mr. Poe conducted extensive research to determine that the previously unknown Count Olaf resided merely cross-town from the Baudelaire family while all other relatives resided farther away.  Accordingly, Count Olaf, although a very distant and heretofore unknown relative of the Baudelaire orphans, indeed, constituted the geographically “closest” relative.  To Mr. Poe, the trust language could not be more clear with the orphans placed with the evil Count Olaf.  Let the fun begin!

The parents’ use of ambiguous language set in motion the Series of Unfortunate Events for the Baudelaire children.  Avoid your own Mr. Poe interpreting your Will or Trust after you are gone.  Provide specific and clear direction and instruction.  At times, descriptions in a Will or Trust may appear complex or cumbersome.  I can live with that approach if it ensures that the Count Olafs are avoided.

The Slayer Rule Has Been Slain

The recent hit film, Knives Out, combines a classic tale of greedy relatives fighting over the bounty with a “whodunit” murder mystery.  Successful novelist and ultra-wealthy head of the family, Harlan Trombey, is discovered murdered on his palatial estate.  As the movie unfolds, each character lays claim to the riches providing the rationale and basis for the position superior to the other seekers of the riches.  Certain characters form alliances to bolster their claims and undercut the efforts of the others.  Everyone believes themselves fully entitled to the inheritance.

This pit of vipers truly has their Knives Out prepared to stab each other in the back in order to advance.  And yet, each character possesses motive and opportunity to have murdered Ol’ Trombey.  Every character is flawed and equally unlikeable.  The plot twists and misdirections are classic.

Overlooked with all the drama in Knives Out is the Slayer Rule.  If you meet your demise at the hands, or due to the actions, of another, those who caused your death cannot gain from your death.  The Slayer cannot benefit in the slaying and cannot collect any inheritance.  Well-drafted Wills and Trusts expressly disinherit the Slayer.  Many states have now enacted their own statutory version of the Slayer Rule.

The entire storyline for Knives Out will not be revealed here nor will it reveal “whodunit”. The plot makes for an enjoyable movie even if the writers slew the Slayer Rule.

Blinded By Greed

Courtesy of the streaming services. The Estate hit the Little Screen in 2022.  The wealthy spinster aunt, played by a curmudgeonly Kathleen Turner, confronts her final battles with illness as her misogynistic, self-centered nieces and nephews appear out of nowhere seeking to position themselves to inherit the aunt’s fortunes.  Each niece and nephew believe a few acts of kindness at death’s door will place them in the best stead after a lifetime of neglect of the aunt.  Alliances are made and disregarded.  Backstabbing is the norm.

One niece convinces her husband to seduce the failing aunt in an effort to court favor.  The creepy nephew keeps attempting to seduce his cousin including directions to internet sites which encourage “love” among cousins.  Yuck!  Each niece and nephew is throughly unlikeable.  You either root for the least unlikeable niece or root for “none of the above”.

Even if these characters would otherwise be normal and act with some degree of moral propriety, the greed and potential to inherit everything drives each cousin to act without regard for their aunt, for each other, or for anyone else in their lives.  Of course, the surprise ending leaves the cousins with nothing except the ugly painting cast off to the ugly niece at the reading of the Will.  A final plot twist after the reading of the Will helps, but these characters remain fatally flawed.  

Unfortunately, in estate administration, such characters or their characteristics come to life all too often.  In planning out your estate, you may not be able to determine who may cause disruption and chaos among your family and loved ones.  In some instances, when clients are candid, such characters can be identified.  In those instances, the Will or Trust can include guardrails and protections to better ensure that wishes are followed and some level of peace remains among those left behind.

So, enjoy your own July 4th Week and even take in a movie if you wish.  Perhaps the cinema could replay a classic movie where the action is more civil and more polite than these rabid families bent on destroying one another.  You know, a movie like Jaws.