4000 Years and Going
How are your New Year’s Resolutions coming along? If you have already tapped out or about to abandon ship on your Resolutions, you have company. Today, Friday, January 10, 2025 is National Quitter’s Day. Sociologists determined that the second Friday of the New Year to be the day most folks give up on New Year’s Resolutions.
Not surprisingly, more than half of us abandon our New Year’s Resolutions in January. By February, that figure exceeds 80%. One recent study found that a mere 9% of New Year’s Resolutions succeed. And still, the precise day most people give up remains the second Friday of each January.
The list of top resolutions made this year ring familiar: first is to save more money; second is to eat healthier; third is to exercise more; fourth is to lose weight; and fifth is to spend more time with family and friends. Personally, I interpret the last resolution as putting down those electronic devices and directly interacting with actual people – if we can remember how to do so!
Reviewing this list, it strikes me that self-improvement resolutions to improve diet, exercise more, and lose weight can more easily fall to the wayside quickly. If you made it to the gym only two times since New Year’s Day and grabbed fast food for dinner after working late, you may be ready to cry uncle on National Quitter’s Day. If co-workers are meeting up for Happy Hour on Friday, January 10 enjoying plates of deep-fried appetizers and a few rounds of drinks, you just may toast National Quitter’s Day and await next year.
However, spending more time with family could barely be given a chance by January 10. Only one weekend took place since New Year’s Day before January 10. Perhaps some actually spent those additional hours with family and then decided by National Quitter’s Day that this particular resolution may not have been well thought out.
The top resolution of saving more money had very little to no opportunity for success by National Quitter’s Day. Any financial plan, however modest or complex, could not be set in realistic motion by January 10. Yet, I acknowledge that I may be overthinking this resolution as well. If your resolution to save more money meant giving up $5 coffee drinks, that resolution could have cratered by January 2.
I previously wrote about New Year’s Resolutions with emphasis on why we keep making resolutions each year even when we think we may well not succeed. As a group, we maintain confidence in ourselves that we can, and we will, improve. We have hope. We express that hope through new (or repeated) resolutions beginning on January 1.
Societies have been making resolutions at the start of a new year for over 4,000 years. The ancient Babylonians celebrated New Year with resolutions with this tradition continuing in some form for millennia. We possess an innate desire to at least try to improve.
New Year’s Resolutions are important to us as so many of us take the time and reflection necessary to make them. We do it every year. We have been doing it since the time of King Tut. So, why do we fail so quickly to the point that we now have National Quitter’s Day? More critically, what, if anything, can we do to improve our chances to succeed in keeping our resolutions.
A 1960 study found that we need 21 days for old mental images to dissolve and a new one to form. Essentially, if we cannot make it three weeks, we most probably will not succeed. Failures or slip ups by National Quitter’s Day translates to the “old mental images” remaining firmly entrenched in our psyche. Another Sociological analysis in 2009 found that it takes 66 days of new behavior in order to make the conduct automatic for us.
In one sense, 66 days can be viewed as a simple two months plus one week. Surely, we can muster sufficient dedication for these two months to achieve life-altering habits and self-improvement. Yet, in another sense, two months and a week could present plenty of opportunities for life to get in the way of new behaviors. Children may bring home the “crud” from school, infecting the entire house and disrupting your new routines. Work projects and demands may monopolize time and ability to get to the gym or even the grocery store to keep healthier foods at home. An unexpected auto repair or broken washing machine could wipe out the entire savings plan you diligently put in place. Life happens and much life can happen during 66 days.
If the deck is stacked against success to maintain New Year’s Resolutions, how can we improve our chances for success? These same Sociologists casting improbabilities on success rates also identify methods to keep those resolutions.
First, recognize that the elephant can be eaten one bite at a time. Your elephant-sized resolutions may appear so large and daunting that you think it could never be achieved. Break down the resolution into bite-sized accomplishments. Twenty pounds will not be lost in one week. But, one half pound or even one pound a week of weight loss is both realistic and achievable. The elephant cannot be eaten in one sitting.
Second, do not be overly ambitious in goal setting. Challenge yourself to be sure, but do not set yourself up for failure. A goal of volunteering at the food bank until hunger ends in your area is neither realistic, nor measurable. Instead, establish a goal to volunteer 100 hours this year. That goal can be broken down to about ten hours per month which can be incorporated into your otherwise busy schedule. You can track your progress. If you fall behind on volunteer hours, the goal remains and can be made up as the year progresses.
Third, establish accountability. Being accountable not just to yourself, but to others, provides motivation and encouragement. I remember diet programs from the 1990s which included weekly weigh ins in front of the entire group. That step of public accountability provided the impetus for many participants to stick to their diet regimens. Perhaps those programs operated more on fear and embarrassment, but they were marketed as “encouragement”. While that approach also resulted in some quitting the program with their own version of Quitter’s Day, the aspect of accountability resonates. You are more likely to remain on track with resolutions if your progress will be honestly and accurately measured.
Finally, recognize that New Year’s Resolutions are not “pass-fail” propositions. Instead, achieving resolutions is a journey. National Quitter’s Day is premised on the pass-fail mentality. Did not get to the gym four times this week – FAIL. Grabbed lunch at the fast food restaurant – FAIL. Did not save 10% of the first paycheck – FAIL. Let’s all get together on National Quitter’s Day and celebrate FAILURE!
Rather, a journey has ups and downs. Celebrate the successes and learn from the missteps, recognizing that some failures will be included on the path. These New Year’s Resolutions by definition stretch us and challenge us. We are trying to change old methods and the Sociologists advise us it takes time – certainly longer than the second Friday of the new year.
In Estate Planning, all of these steps to improve our chances to succeed in keeping our New Year’s Resolutions are in play. For example, we can focus on the elephant-sized estate plans. Clients, and especially potential clients, often hesitate addressing estate plans as they believe the task is too daunting or monumental. For certain, comprehensive estate plans are complex with the sheer volume of paper at issue scary to many. However, we address each separate document and risk one at a time. The agents to serve on your behalf are selected; the options to include in each power of attorney are addressed; the details of each trust for loved ones are carefully explained. Each step gets us closer to the final, exceedingly large work product. We eat the elephant one bite at a time.
Good luck keeping your New Year’s Resolutions. Remember, it is a journey and not pass-fail!